A very Merry Christmas!

Mili pratele,

Dear friends,

ani poradne nevim jak vyjadrit vdecnost za to, ze jsem se dozil dneska. Ale predtim nez se rozepisu o vanocich, chtel bych se podelit o kratkou zpravu z vanocni vecere prazskeho YL.

I can't tell you how grateful I am for today! But before I go on, let me give you a quick update on the YL Christmas dinner last week and my talk.

Celkem prislo asi 40 studentu. Meli jsme dost jidla pro celou skupinu a oproti lonskemu roku jsme nemeli zadne zbytky! Vsechno snedeno!! Byl jsem mile prekvapen, ze prislo i nekolik studentu a vedoucich z predchozich let a taky jsem si moc uzil cas s lidma z Klubu pratel prazskeho YL. 

We had about 40 students. There was enough food for all 55 of us and this year - NO LEFTOVERS to waste!!!

I was very surprised to see some older students and leaders and it's always a great time to hang out with our committee people!! 

Studenti trpelive poslouchali celou dobu co jsem mluvil. Oni poslouchali me, a ja pak poslouchal studenty a vedouci jak hodnoti muj program. Behem pripravy mi celkova delka vychazela na 13 min, ale to jsem vynechal uvodni videoklip z filmu a necetl jsem k tomu doslova tri pasaze z Bible. Takze celkem to byla pres 20 minut a ty 3 pasaze byly pomerne nesrozumitelne. Slo to rict jinak. Kdybych si to vyzkousel pred vedoucima pred veceri, mel bych zpetnou vazbu hned a mohl jsem to upravit. Ale studenti i vedouci dokazali zopakovat hlavni myslenku - Buh nezapomnel dodrzet svuj slib. Jezis se narodil v pravy cas na pravem miste a byl tou ocekavanou odpovedi na slib dany Abrahamovi, krali Davidovi a potvrzenim proroctvi co mel prorok Isajas. V hodnoceni se vedouci zminovali i o vyzve, kterou jsem dal studentum na letosni vanoce - nenechte si ukrast vanoce Santou, Mikulasem, nebo touhou po mnozstvi darku. Jezis nezustal v jeslickach moc dlouho, vyrostl a byl to ten Mesias, na ktereho cekali cele generace. Dejte si tu praci a obetujte trochu casu, abyste se sami mohli presvedcit, proc se slavi Jezisovo narozeni s takovou slavou. Nebojte se zeptat.

 

Students were kind enough to listen to my talk, and I learned some very valuable lessons. At practice, my talk was 13 minutes long. But that was without showing a movie clip first and also reading 3 passages from the Bible. So in the end, it was over 20min, with 3 heavy Old Testaments quotes. Had i practiced my talk in a presence of a leader or two, they would have already given me the much needed feedback before hand and not just afterwards. But the point was clear - God didn't forget to fulfill his promise. Jesus was born at the perfect time and place in histrory as a promise given to Abraham, King David and an answer to Isaiah's prophesy.  All the leaders whom I asked for evaluation got the point and remembered even the challenge i left the students with - don't let Santa Claus or Nicolas or desire for many gifts steal your Christmas. Jesus didn't stay in the crib for long, he grew and he was the promised Messiah. Take the time this Christmas to find out more about why we celebrate his birth. Ask. 

Sofia a Mia jsou dost stare na to, aby si vanoce pamatovali a dost mlade na to, aby si je poradne uzili se vsim co k nim patri. Jejich radost z vyrabeni a davani darku je silnejsi nez trpelivost, se kterou by mely cekat na Stedry vecer. Uz rano v 7.45 nas s Jane probudily s tim, ze "musime" otevrit darky co nam udelali. Chteji u vseho byt, na vsem se podilet a to jeste stihly si pripravit vanocni koncert pro babicky s dedou!! Mia uz umi asi 15 vanocnich koled a zpiva je porad dokola!! Jejich radost je nakazliva!

This year, Sofia and Mia are at the perfect Christmas age. Their joy of making and giving gifts is making them so impatient that Jane and I had to open our first gifts from them at 7.45am this morning!!!!!  We couldn't even convince them to wait until tonight, when the Baby Jesus is coming with the gifts. They want to help with everything around the house and are preparing a Christmas concert for tonight! Their Czech grandmas and grandpa are coming to join us so they put together a little show. Mia knows about 15 different Czech Christian carols and sings them constantly! What a joy to see their smiles!

Dneska vecer mam posledni davku prasku me pravidelne udrzovaci chemoterapie. A taky jsem moc vdecny, protoze muzeme slavit spolecne s moji rodinou prvni vyroci remise. Behem jara zemrel jeden z mych kamaradu z nemocnice a tak vim, jak blizko jsem se dostal k tomu, abych tyhle vanoce uz nemel s rodinou. Pral bych si (trosku sobecky), aby tu s nami byli i rodice Jane, ale potom co nam 3 roky pomahali a byly tu pokazde na vanocni svatky, tak je cas nechat je uzit si i ostatnich clenu rodiny a pribuznych.

Tonight, not only I will take my last dose of pills of my chemo for this year, but I get to celebrate with my family 1 YEAR in remission !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  The reality is that I lost of one of my hospital friends earlier this year, so I know how close I was to not having this Christmas. Wishing (selfishly) that Jane's parents would be with us, but after their faithful service and help to our family for 3 years, it is time for their own families have their turns. 

Dekujeme za Vase pokracujici modlitby a podporu, ktere se nam od Vas dostava.  Prejeme Vam vsem krasne vanoce!! 

Thank you very much for your continues prayer and support that you show me and my family.  Merry Christmas to all of you! 

V Kristu,

In Christ,

Martin

advent update:: from Martin

Mili pratele,

Dear friends,

Rad bych se s Vami podelil o dve zpravy. 

Ta prvni je o mem zdravotnim stavu. Minuly tyden jsem mel kontrolu s odebranim vzorku krve a kostni drene. 

Protoze se ani muj osetrujici lekar a  ani nikdo jiny z nemocnice se neozval, beru to, ze je vsechno ciste a bez pritomnosti leukemie.

S mirnymi obtizemi, souvisejicimi s udrzovaci chemoterapii, kterou znova po 3 mesicich prochazim,se chystam na cilovou rovinku 1. roku remise!!!!!!!!!! Ani ne 10 dni..

There are two things that I would like to share with you. 

The first one is about my test results. Last week I gave blood and bone marrow samples. Since neither the doctor nor the hospital staff called, I take it that both samples are clear!!!! I am currently having some difficulties with side effects to the pills I am taking as part of my maintenance chemo, but other than that I am heading for the finish line of ONE YEAR in remission!!!!!!!!!!!! In less then 10 days..

Jsem nesmirne vdecny za kazdy den, i kdyz ne kazdy den je takovy jaky bych si ho pral mit. Porad se musim ucit co to znamena nasledovat Jezise, nest bremeno a ale mit hlavu nahore s vyhledem na Jeho milost a Jeho pozvani ke spolecne vecnosti. Na prvni adventni bohosluzbe jsme meli moznost zapalit ve sboru svicku a rict neco o uplynulem roce. Byl to dobry zacatek adventu, ale nebyt nasi domaci skupinky a nedelnich bohosluzeb, urcite bych se nechal pohltit kolotocem toho vseho, co bych jeste chtel do vanoc stihnout. 

I am very thankful for each new day, but have to confess that not every day goes according to my plan. It always brings me back to basics of how to follow and trust Jesus, bear the cross, but have the hope in His grace and invitation to be in His presence for eternity. My family was asked to light the first advent candle during our church service and say a few words about last year. It was a great start of advent, but if it was not for our home group and Sunday service, i would easily get sucked into the whirpool of things that MUST be done before Christmas. 

Minuly tyden jsem byl pozvan mezi studenty Evangelikalniho teologickeho seminare na praktickou cast jejich vyucovani s nazvem Praxis Pieatatis. Pro me osobne to byla vyzva srovnat si myslenky a ohlednout se za rokem, ktery se od tech predchozich dost odlisoval. Nejvetsi radosti pro me byly rozhovory, ktere zacaly na zaklade sdileni o pokracovani "cesty udolim". Znamena to, ze alespon nekteri studenti poslouchali, a pak se o bolesti, smrti, zdravotnich problemech chteli bavit na osobni rovine.  Ale mel jsem jeste jeden duvod k radosti. Nechci odhadovat presna cisla, ale oproti lonskemu roku byla skupina aspon dvojnasobna!!! To znamena, ze jsou dalsi mladi lide, kteri prozili povolani do sluzby a jsou ochotni vykrocit!!!!!!! To je uzasna zprava pro ceskou cirkev! 

As I mentioned before, I was asked to come to speak to the seminary students during their Praxis Pietatis. It was good for me to sit down and sort out my thoughts as I looked back at the last 15 months, that were different from anything else in my life. It was a joy to have personal conversations with some of the students afterwards, hearing their stories and how they want to help those in need. But there was one more reason for joy! The group was about twice as big as last year!!!! There are more young people who have answered God's call to ministry and they stepped out in faith. That is a great news for the Czech church!!

V tomto tydnu probehna i Vanocni vecere prazskeho Young Lifu, kam jsem pozvan abych studentum "neco" rekl. Tesim se, i kdyz jsem nervozni. Prosim pripojte se k mym modlitbam, abych mel nejen fyzicky dost sil (kvuli chemoterapii jsem vice unaveny a potrebuji pres den spat) ale taky aby moje slova byla prijata studenty jako vyzva ke vztahu s Tim, kdo splnil slib a poslal lidem opravdoveho Mesiase.

The YL Prague's Christmas dinner is on the schedule for this week. I am invited to have the club talk or as we talk about it - tell "something" to the students. I am looking forward to it, but i am also nervous. Please join me in my prayers for having enough physical strength (I am taking the chemo pills again and need to nap during every day) but more importantly that my words will challenge students to start their own relationship with the One, who promised and gave us the real Messiah.

Brzo napisu, jak to dopadlo.

I will soon send another update.

Preji Vam predvanocni tyden naplneny Bozim pokojem,

May your pre-Christmas week be filled with God's peace!

Martin

November 19

Mili pratele,

Dear friends,

Zub byl uspesne vytrzen a jsem objednan na dalsi kontrolu se zady ke specialistovi, ktery je nejen ortoped, ale take neurolog. Presne co jsem potreboval, tak doufam, ze mi pomuze a bolesti zad se nebudou zhorsovat.

The tooth is out and I have an appointment to see another ortopedic/neurogy doctor who might be able to help me with my back pain and tensions.

Kdyz jsem vchazel do ordinace me zubarky, uvedomil jsem si, ze jsem doma nechal zpravu z meho posledniho vysetreni. Podivala se na me a s usmevem pronesla: “Kdyz byste si nebyl jisty, ze to prezijete, tak byste sam a dobrovolne neprisel. Nikdo sem nechodi, kdyz nemusi.”

When I was going to my dentist, I forgot to bring the last report to confirm that my blood sample numbers were good enough for me to undergo this stressful event. My dentist just smiled at me and said – “You wouldn’t be here, if you were not sure that you can survive this. No one comes here, unless they have to. ”

To mi dodalo potrebnou odvahu abych se uvelebil v kresle a dostal davku anastetik. Teda vlastne hned dve, to pro jistotu, abych opravdu nic necitil. Pravda je, ze jsem dva dny potom nic necitil, za to ve ctvrtek rano, to byl mazec.. Jeste, ze jsou ty ruzovy prasky co tlumi bolest..

Seeing her confidence gave me the extra confidence to sit and receive the local annastacia. To be sure that I don’t feel anything I got an extra dose and sure enough I didn’t feel anything for two days!!!! But Thursday morning when I could feel everything, I was thankful for the magic of pain killing pill…

Po dvou tydnech muzu stastne podat zpravu, ze se citim dobre, chodim znovu na prochazky jak jen to jde, procvicuji zada a odpocivam kdyz potrebuji.Jane rodice prijeli na navstevu na nekolik tydnu a je to opravdove Bozi pozehnani, protoze ted nejsem ani v nemocnici a ani nemam zadnou chemoterapii! Chemoterapie prijde az po pulce prosince. Takze si ted uzivam to, ze je nas vsech sest pohromade, muzeme se prochazet spolecne a spolecne jime u jednoho stolu.

Two weeks later I can report that I still feel great, going for walks as much as I can, stretching my back and resting as much as I need to. We are blessed to have Jane’s parents with us for the next few weeks and this time, neither am I in the hospital nor do I have any chemotherapy. (the chemo is scheduled for later in December).So we have a great time together all 6 of us!!!!! It is a gift to me, that there are places we can walk to and I get to enjoy MY time with Ernie and Judy outside of the hospital as well as to be part of the family meals.

Krome casu s rodinou mam take pred sebou dva programy, kam jsem byl pozvan jako host jeste v case pred vanocemi. Jeden program je soucasti pripravy budoucich pastoru a cirkevnich pracovniku na Evangelikalnim seminari v Praze nazvan Praxis Pietatis. Vloni jsem ke studentum mluvil nekolik dni pred nasim planovanym odletem do USA, a na misto cesty do zamori me cekala zprava o dalsim relapsu, cesty na ozarovani a chemoterapie a pobyt v nemocnici.

Outside of enjoying the time with Jane’s parents and my family, I have been invited to speak to two students groups at different venues before Christmas. One is a group of students at the Evangelical Theological Seminary, who are studying and in training to become pastors and church ministers of local churches. Last year I spoke during their “Praxis Pietatis” a few days before we were planning to leave for the extended time in the USA. Instead of our departure, a few days later came the news of my yet another relaps and travel to US was exchanged for chemo, radiation and hospital stay.

Stejne jako vloni jsem pozvan sdilet svuj pribeh s jeste vetsi skupinou studentu o tom, co jsem se naucil o Bozi lasce, Jeho ocekavanich ode mne a jak se promenuje muj zivot s vyhledem na nadeji, ze tato kapitola prochazeni udolim se snad blizi ke konci. Je to velice podobne nacasovani jako minuly rok. Jen den pred tim dam krev a kostni dren a budu cekat na vysledky. Je to pro me neskutecna milost, ktera me vede na kolena s vdecnosti, ze si me Buh, ktery zna presny pocet mych dni, pouziva k tomu abych mluvil se studenty o Jeho zpusobech a Jeho planech, kterymi vede muj zivot.

This year, the faculty of this program asked me to come back as the group is bigger and they would like for them to hear about what God has taught me in the last year about His love for me, His expectations of me and the way my life continues to change as I (still) hope to be heading for an exit from this season. it will be a very similar situation when I will speak to the group only a day after giving blood and  bone marrow sample and waiting for the results. It is a privilege and it brings me to my knees that I get to share with them about God, who knows the count of my days left, continues to use me to share about His ways and His plans taking place in my life.

Druhym programem kde mam tu cest promluvit a sdilet se o Bohu, ve ktereho verim, je vanocni vecere prazskeho Young Lifu. Lonska vecere se skutecne vydarila a potvdilo se, ze obrovske mnozstvi bramboroveho salatu a jeste vetsi hromada smazenych rizku je a porad zustava dobrou pozvankou nejen pro studenty co chodi na Young Life pravidelne, ale I pro ty, kdo z ruznych duvodu nemuzou byt na akcich kazdy tyden. Mam za ukol stoupnout si pred studenty a neco jim rict. To by samo o sobe nebylo tak tezke, kdyby.. to uz nebyly tri roky co jsem naposledy stal pred studenty a mluvil k nim jako nekdo koho znaji a kdo zna je. Od te doby co Marek Sramek vede YL v Praze, studenti co jsem znal jsou uz pryc a na jejich miste jsou studenti, ktere jsem videl kdyz tak jen parkrat.. Nervozita je o trochu vyssi nez obvykle, ale jinak se moc tesim!

The other group is a group of students who attend the Young Life activities. Last year’s Christmas club that was in a style of a Christmas dinner was a great success. Plenty of potato salad and plenty of Wiener Schnitzel is always a great draw even for students who don’t come regularly or for different reasons are not part of the weekly programs. I have been asked to be a guest speaker on that night and give a club talk. It has been over three years since my last club talk and I don’t know any of the students on a personal level. Since Marek Sramek took over the leadership of YL Prague, the group of students I knew graduated and moved on and the younger once have taken their place. As much as I rejoice that these are new students, I am also a little nervous because I don’t know them and they don’t know me.

Vazim si obou dvou pozvanich, a nebo bych to mel vzit sportovne a rict ze to jsou nove vyzvy? At uz tak nebo tak bude to pro me dalsi krok ve sluzbe Bohu, ktery uprostred meho udoli a pomale rekonvalescence mi dava silu a radost ze sdileni o Nem a jak moc se sami ochuzujeme, kdyz se k Nemu obracime zady at uz pri nemoci nebo v kazdodennim obycejnem zivote.

 I am excited about both of these opportunities. Or should I call them challenges? Either way it is a privilege for me to serve God, who in the midst of the valley and my slow pace of life, gives me strength and excitement to share about who He is and how much we miss by turning our back on Him, whether in hard circumstances or in just regular daily life.

Prosim Vas, primlouvejte se za oba tyto programy a taky za moje zlepsujici se zdravi. Jsme vdecni za Vasi pokracujici podporu a pomoc, se kterou zahrnujete Jane, Sofii, Miu a me.

I would appreciate your prayers for both of these events as well for my improving health. Thank you for your support and care that you continue to offer to Jane, Sofia, Mia and to me.

Preji Vam, abyste znali a zakusili plnost Jeho lasky!

May you know and experience the richness of His Love,

Martin

stepping into new territory

Milí přátelé,

zdravím Vás po delší době, s Boží milostí již 10tý měsíc v remisi!!

Dear friends,

greetings to you after a few months, by God’s grace already 10^th month in remission.

Když se před devíti lety Jane přestěhovala do Prahy a začala se učit česky, jedna z nejtěžších věcí se kterou se setkala byla neustále se opakující otázka: “Tak co tvoje čeština?” Z týdne na týden se toho moc nezměnilo, bylo těžké odpovědět na to co nového se naučila a jak se jí celá ta gramatická mosaika skládá (nebo neskládá) dohromady. O to větší byla radost, když jsme se po několika měsících ohlédli zpět a její pokrok byl dost znatelný.

When Jane moved to Prague nine years ago, one of the unexpected and hard things was to answer a question that she was asked regularly every week: How is your Czech? From week to week there was not much to report, and it was hard to explain how far she progressed in the process of putting the grammar puzzle all together. But the more joy there was to look back after a few months to see how far she got!

Naposledy jsem psal v květnu, když jsem měl pocit, že mě Pán Bůh provedl určitou životní kapitolou a měl jsem o čem psát. Od té doby jsem si každý týden sliboval, že napíšu krátkou zprávu a intervaly budu postupně zkracovat. Opak je ale realitou. Abych se přiznal, nevědel jsem o čem psát. Uplynulých pět měsíců nelze nazvat jinak než nezaslouženým dárkem prodlouženého života, ale teprve až když se zastavím a ohlédnu, vidím ty detaily mosaiky, které se skládají dohromady.

Last time I sat down to write an update, it was in May and I felt that God let me through a life chapter that came to an end and I had something to write about. Since then I was planning to write shorter updates and more often, but in reality I didn’t know what to write about. It didn’t seem like I have anything to report, just like Jane with her Czech.

Malá dcera jednoho mého kamaráda křesťana prohlásila, že za Martina se už modlit nemusí, protože on už má vlasy a fousy, a tak už je zdravej! To, co je pro nás s Jane odlišné je fakt, že už jsem “měl vlasy a fousy” dvakrat za poslední dvě léta a pak na podzim přišel relaps.

One of my Christian friends’ daughter told her dad, that she is no longer going to pray for me, because I have my hair and beard back so I am healthy. I wish it would be that simple for Jane and I. We know that I had “hair and beard” last two summers and then twice in the fall, in the 10th month,  a relapse came out of the blue.

Vstoupil jsem do jedenáctého měsíce v remisi, překročil jsem o krůček místo, kde už jsem jednou předtím byl. Na cestě z údolí jsem zatím nejdál. Za to jsem moc vděčný a užívám si každý den! Po fyzické stránce jsem se dostal na svojí původní váhu. Dlouhé jarní měsíce jsem nemohl nabrat potřebných pět až deset kil, které šli během chemoterapie a ozařování dolů. Během léta bylo jednodušší začít prodlužovat procházky na čerstvém vzduchu a s přibívajícími kilometry rostla i chuť k jídlu. Zabral i osvědčený český recept – jíst banány a pít pivo (ne najednou!). Jenom český doktor může něco takového doporučit!!!

I have crossed into 11^th month of living in remission and got just one step further in the journey through the valley then in the past. I am very thankful for each new day and enjoy it to the full capacity as much as I am able to. Physically, I have gained the lost weight – about 10 pounds that I was missing since the chemo and radiation. Once the spring rolled into summer and I prolonged my walks outside, my appetite increased with the walked kilometers. Only in Czech would doctor recommend you to gain weight by eating bananas and drinking beer (not at the same time!) to gain weight! But it did work!!!!!!!!!!

Ještě v květnu nechtěl můj ošetřující lékař nic slyšet o tom, že jsem měl touhu letět na celoevropskou konferenci Young Life. Můj imunitní system a ani krevní obraz prostě na takovou akci ještě nebyli připravené. Množství lidí na malém prostoru, cirkulovaný vzduch klimatizace letadla a letiště jsou dobrým zdrojem jak si uhnat další komplikace, pokud na to organismus není vyzbrojen. O to větší radost byla v červenci, kdy dva dny před odletem jsem dostal zelenou a mohl se společně s Jane a holkama vypravit za rodinou do USA. Dostalo se nám velice vřelého přijetí, a vzpomínky na tuto návštěvu zaznívají v našich rozhovorech dost často a je skvělé, že už to jsou zážitky, které si pamatuje jak Sofia, tak Mia. Byl to Bohem požehnaný čas s rodinou a přáteli, stihli jsme I několik pracovních věcí, ale stejně jako jsme se radovali, tak jsme citili váhu bolesti všude kolem nás. Byli jsme pozvání k naslouchání svědectví jednotlivců a rodin prožívajících zdravotní nebo finanční těžkosti. Uvědomil jsem si, jak málo jsem vděčný za náš sociální stát a jeho pomoc jednotlivci v těžkostech.

My doctor didn’t approve of my travel plans to fly to our European YL Conference in May. The blood results and my immune system were not in good enough shape to deal with the mass of people in a small place like an airport and the circulated air-conditioned air would be just another danger that could make things complicated. Just three months later, I got a green light to board a plane and join Jane and the girls to visit her family in the US. We were acting in faith when purchasing the tickets with the option of cancelation to the last minute, to hear YES only two days before leaving Prague. We were welcomed with open arms and with such hospitality, that memories of this time are often part of our conversations. Both Sofia and Mia have a lot of new stories to remember and share from the other side of the ocean. It was a time blessed by the Almighty God with our family and friends, we were able to take care of couple of business things as well. But as much as we were able to rejoice and enjoy the depth of the relationships, we were invited to listen to stories of individual and families who are struggling health-wise or financially. It really put it in perspective for me to realize the details of and be more thankful for the social care the Czech republic is providing for sick people like myself.

Během přístích dnů mě čekají dvě vyšetření, které tak trochu prověří můj opravdový zdravotní stav. Neustále mě ještě trápí bolestí zad a to zvláště v oblasti krční páteře. Kombinace většího počtu lumbalních punkcí a ochablého zádového svalstva je asi příčinou bolestí, ale jestli tam je něco víc nebo ještě něco jiného, ukáže vyšetření na ortopedii.

In the coming days I have two doctors appointments. It will be a test of how well I am really doing. Ever since the lumber punctures my back has not stopped hurting especially in the upper part. It might be the combination of number of the lumbar punctures with weak muscles of the back, or it could be something else as well. Hoping and praying for the orthopedic doctor to help me get rid of this pain.

Druhým zákrokem je vytržení zubu. Půjdu si sednout do toho samého křesla, kde to všechno doslova před 3 lety začalo. Zátěžová zkouška, jak pro tělo, tak pro hlavu. Bojím se, ale mám naději, že mé tělo je připravené. V duchu si říkám, kdo je asi víc nervózní, já nebo moje (skvělá!!) zubařka?

The other appointment is with my dentist. I will go and sit in the same chair, where it all started three years ago almost to the date. Taking out a tooth will be a heavy-duty test for my body and for my mind as well. I am afraid, but with the hope that my body is ready for it. I wonder, who is more nervous, my (great!) dentist or me?

Další kontrolu u mého doktora mám až v prosinci. Pokud by můj vzorek krve a kostní dřeně byl čistý, naděje že oslavím o vánocích výročí 1. roku v remisi se zvyšuje.Modlím se a přeju si to jako dárek nejen pro sebe, pro Jane a holky, naše rodiny, ale taky pro Vás všechny, kteří se za nás vytrvale modlíte, posíláte pozdravy a povzbuzujete nás na naší cestě údolím, která se snad blíží ke konci.

My next check up of blood sample and bone marrow is scheduled for December. When or if these will come back clean, I am hopeful that I will be able to celebrate a 1 YEAR anniversary in remission on Christmas Day. I would take it as a special gift from God for myself, for Jane and the girls and also to ALL OF YOU, who are continuing to pray for us, sending us greetings and packages, and encouraging us on this journey through the valley that we hope will come to an end soon.

Slibuji, že podám zpravu během přístích dvou týdnů. Děkuji Vám znovu za Vaši projevenou lásku a starost, jsme vděčni za každého z Vás.

I promise to write an update before the next two weeks are over. Thank you again for your love and care, we are thankful for each one of you.

Žehnám Vám jménem Ježíše Krista,

With the blessing in the name of Jesus Christ,

Martin

reflections from Martin

Milí přátelé,

Dear friends,

Děkuji za Vaše neustávající modlitby a dotazy na mé zdraví. V uplynulých dvou týdnech jsem prošel dalšími testy a v tuto chvíli můžu slavit skoro 5 měsíců, co bych měl být bez leukemie!!  Pamatuji si, jak na vánoce za mnou přisla doktorka se  zprávou, že se testy mozkomišního moku vrátili negativní. Ležel jsem v nemocnici a ta nejagresivnější chemoška byla ještě přede mnou.

Thank you very much for all your prayers and continues inquires about my health. In the past two weeks I have had some more tests, and at the moment I can celebrate almost 5 months of no leukemia!!!! The remission goes back to December 24, 2013 when the doctors said the spinal fluid tests of were clear. At that point I was in the hospital and the most aggressive chemo treatment was still ahead of me.

Důvod proč to zmiňuji je prostý. Během toho, co mé tělo trpělo fyzicky, a modlím se abych už nemusel ničím takovým projít, se moje ztišení před Bohem začalo točit okolo jediného slova – smrt. Od nemocnice až po Velikonoce mě pronásledovala otázka “Seš připraven zemřít?” Tou nejpodstatnější částí té otázky je v jakého Boha vlastně věřím.

The reason I want to go back to this time is very simple. As much as my body was hurting, and I pray I will never have to undergo the treatment again, the one word that began to shape my time with God was death. Throughout that time in the hospital and all the way to Easter, I was faced with the question, “are you ready to die?” The most difficult part of the question is really about WHO the God is in whom I believe.

Jako děti jsme se ségrou usínali u rozsvíceného globusu. Díval jsem se na něj a přemýšlel jak dlouho potom co já umřu se bude ještě svět točit. Byl to začatek mého vlastního hledání odpovědí jestli existuje věčnost a jestli je nějaká bytost/bůh, která by měla alespoň trochu zájem o nás, lidská stvoření.

As kids, my sister and I would fall asleep to a light in a shape of a globe, which made me wonder how long after I die the world would keep spinning? It was the beginning of my own journey of questioning the existence of eternity, and of a being/god, who might possibly have an interest in us, human beings.

To, co jsem od doby objevil a zažil mě vedlo k rozhodnuti věřít a přijmout biblický příběh za svůj světonázor.  Za těch posledních 20 letech, kdy se pokouším imitovat život Ježíše a v praxi žít co učil, jsem měl minimálně důvodů k přemýšlení o tom, jak se připravit na konec života. 

My discoveries led me to make a decision to believe and accept the biblical message as my worldview. In almost 20 years of trying to imitate the life of Jesus, and practicing his teaching, I hardly had a reason to think about, or “to get ready” for the end.

Podobným způsobem, jakým si Bůh použil co mě bavilo (sport, cestovaní a filmy) k tomu, abych ho mohl poznat na začátku 90.let, pobyt v nemocnici a samotná nemoc stačily k tomu, abych viděl reálnou podobu smrti. Už to přestala být ta smrt co přichází zaslouženě ve věku nad 80 let, ve spánku. Viděl jsem co to známená trpět v bolestech, být napojen na přistroje co zajišťují životní funkce když orgány selžou a to vše bez možnosti komunikovat o tom, co se děje uvnitř hlavy. Jsem připraven na smrt a co přijde dál? Bude vůbec něco?

In a similar way to how I saw God use what I liked (sports, traveling and movies) to show me who he is back in early 90’s, the hospital reality, and the sickness, offered enough inputs for me to pick up on a different reality of death. Death as something which is not coming at the age of 80+ and in sleep, as many of us wish, but with long pain, organ failures supported by machines, having hardly any way to communicate. Am I ready for that and for what is next? What is next, anyway?

Každé ráno se probouzím blíž smrti. Hotovo. Tady moc prostor pro diskuzi není. Po propuštění z nemocnice jsem četl příběhy lidí, kteří byli umučeni pro svojí víru, o lidech, kteří zemřeli po těžké nemoci nebo během války, ale také příběhy těch, kteří přežili smrtelné nemoci, pronásledování, násilí, války a přírodní katastrofy. Nečte se to snadno.Kladu si ale otázku, kdo jiný, než křesťani by měli být připravení na smrt a beze strachu?

Every day I wake up.. I am closer to the day I will die. Period. No discussion there. During my recovery time at home, I read a lot about martyrs, people who suffered for their faith, about people who lost their lives to sickness or wars, but also about those who survived the worst of deceases, persecution, violence, wars and natural disasters. Not easy reads. But in the end, who else other than Christians “should” be ready to die well and without fear?

Ze svědectví těch co jdou před námi jsem se naučil tyhle tři věci. Životy těch co přežili, byly plné vděčnosti a díků za nový den bez bolesti a utrpení. Nesobecky a se soucitem se starají o ty, kdo trpi. Jejich životy nebyly procházkou růžovou zahradou, ale jejich volba důvěřovat Bohu nehledě na okolnosti je postavila do roli těch, kteří spolu-trpěli s nadějí, kterou mohli sdilet s ostatními.

Three things I learned from those who went/go before us. Those who survived were full of gratitude and thankfulness for a new day without pain. Their kind, servant’s spirits were filled with compassion towards the hurting. That doesn’t mean they themselves experienced an absence of new difficulties, but their choice to trust God with their circumstances, turned them into fellow-sufferers, who had hope to offer to others. 

Příběhy, které jsem četl taky dosvědčovaly Boží přítomnost v životě těch kdo trpěli a umírali. Pokud je Bůh pozván, slibuje nám svoji přítomnost v našich životech. Neslibuje nám, že zůstaneme na živu dokud se naše sny nenaplni.V těch nejtěžších momentech, údolích smrti, jsem nejjasněji viděl realitu Božího království. Boží láska, jeho soucit, jeho “zapletenost” do našich každodenních životů, jeho příchod na Zem v osobě Ježíše Krista, to vše jsem prožíval daleko intenzivněji. Bůh nemusel změnit plán A za plán B protože jsem onemocněl. On ví, a vždycky vědel kdy bude můj posledni den.S velkou pokorou si troufám říct, že se smrti nebojím. Bojim se umírání, ne smrti. Byl jsem jí natolik blízko, že vím, že sám nemůžu ustát ohrožení se kterým útočí na můj život. Ten byl a je natolik pestrý, že síla zemřít v pokoji musí přijít s nadějí, která převyšuje tento život.

The stories, which I read, have also testified of God’s presence in lives of those suffering and dying. When God is welcomed, He promises us his presence in our lives; he does not promise to keep us alive until we achieve our dreams. My physically hardest moments, the valleys of shadow of death, were spiritually the best moments of seeing God’s kingdom in its reality. God’s love, his compassion, his “moving to our neighborhood in Jesus Christ”; all of that became even more real in my own life. God didn’t have to switch from plan A to plan B because I got sick. He knows, as he always knew, the day I will leave this life. I humbly acknowledge, that death is no longer a threat to me. I fear dying, not the death. I have been close enough to know that it’s not me who has the power to withstand the threat that it represents. My life has always been so rich, that dying and the strength to die well must come from a hope, which goes beyond this life.

Poslední věc je o samotném Bohu, jak o něm čtu v bibli. Pokud by ten pokoj a radost, kterou jsem zažil během pobytu v nemocnici, jenom zčásti odráželi podstatu Božské Přírozenosti a jeho radosti ze společenství s lidmi které sám stvořil, pak se opravdu těším na věčnost v Jeho přítomnosti. Přiznám se, že “usmívající se” radostný Bůh, nebyl vždycky to, jak jsem si Ho představoval. Byl milující, ale s očekáváním výsledků, milující perfekcionista, jehož tvář je vice naštvaná než spokojená s tím, co vidí v mém životě. Být s takovým bohem na věčností by ale bylo peklo! Jak by to někdo mohl nazývat nebem? Ježíš mluvil se svými následovníky o radosti, kterou jim předá. Myslím, že trochu začínám rozumnět co tím myslel. Nemůžu říct, že jsem vděčný za leukemii, ale to co jsem  během nemoci zažil s Bohem mi nikdo vzít nemůže. Obraz Boha, který se raduje z mého probuzení do nového dne, mě učí vděčnosti za to co je za mnou. Důvěřuju mu s tím co má příjít, těch věcí co mám já pod kontrolou moc není. Cítím obrovskou svobodu a úlevu nehodnotit svůj život podle toho co jsem udelal, kam jsem to dotáhl nebo co dokážu.

The last thing is about the God of the Bible. If the peace and joy I experienced with God  while lying in the hospital bed is only a glimpse of God’s joyful Existence, who delights in the company of his created beings, then I want to be with him for eternity. I will confess that a “joyful” God was not always the strongest image I had in my mind before. My image of God was more like loving but demanding, loving but perfectionist, whose face is more displeased  than pleased with me. It would literally be hell to be with such a god for eternity, and it shouldn’t be called heaven!!! Jesus talked about passing on the joy of his presence to his disciples, and I think that now I am beginning to understand what he meant. I can’t say that I am thankful for cancer, but I know that what I experienced with my God, can’t be taken away. The image of God’s face smiling when I wake up to start another day makes me be thankful for the past, trusting him for a new day, which I have no control of.  I am free to let go of evaluating my life by what I do(ne), what I achieve(d) or how I perform(ed).

Díky tomu všemu, se nebojím smrti. Jeden den bude ten poslední. A já chci odejít s pokojem a nadějí. Kdybych si mohl vybrat, pořád bych si přál být zachovalým osmdesatníkem, který zemře ve spánku na selhání srdce. Chtěl bych zestárnout po boku Jane, dožít se toho jak Sofia a Mia žijí svoje životy mimo náš domov a důvěřují Bohu s tím co je potká. To je můj sen.  

As a result of all of this, death is no longer a threat. I will die one day. And I want to die well. If you ask me, I hope I will be a semi-healthy 80+ year old, whose heart will stop working during my sleep. I can’t wait to grow old with Jane, to see Sofia and Mia pick up their lives outside of mom and dad’s home, trusting God in their own ways with each day of their lives. This is my dream.

Nemůžu si nic nárokovat. Před dvěma týdny zemřel kamarád na leukemii. Minulý týden jsem dostal zpravu že jiný můj kamarád má rakovinu. Mám na výběr, jestli se pokusím udělat všechno pro to, abych si mohl splnit můj sen za cenu pokusu vymazaní bolestí z mého života a to až tak, že mě to nakonec zabije. Nebo můj život odevzám Ježíši a budu mu důvěřovat.

There are no guarantees. Two weeks ago a friend of mine died of leukemia. Last week another friend was diagnosed with cancer. I have a choice, to do anything in my power to fulfill my dream, attempting to avoid the painful reality of life which might eventually kill me. Or I can give it to Jesus and daily trust Him with my life.

Vybral jsem si to druhé. A naplňuje mě to radostí.

I choose the latter. And it comes with a new kind of smile.

bike ride to skolka

This morning, Martin and the girls put on their helmets and gloves, got on their bikes and set off of the 4 min bike ride to preschool. Now in a quiet house, I am sitting here thankful. So thankful. This bike ride to school is a special ritual at our house that has been put on hold for a long time. How good it feels to brush the dust off and start it again, despite the cold rainy morning!

'The apostles said to the Lord, 'Increase our faith!' Luke 17:5
I am thankful this morning not because things seem more normal and a little more healthy here in our home, but because I can feel the way my heart, my hope and my faith have been stretched. I want to take this moment, freeze it and remember it so that it can be a building block in my faith. I admit that there were times this winter that I did fear that when spring would come, this morning wouldn't happen. That the bikes would stay inside. Not only because Martin was ill, but the girls were also sick for so long. That this morning would never happen again.

Even in that fear, I could feel the shift in my heart moving from longing for health to asking for faith.

So this bike ride is news and it does mean something for today. It doesn't promise anything for the future, but it reminds me that change happens and that God is healing our little family in many ways. Who knows if next week it will happen again. 'Lord, increase my faith today.'

2 months later..

After dinner tonight, I knew I had to write this blog post. The girls did something completely unexpected, something that brought tears to our eyes...something remarkable.

Az po dnesni veceri nastal ten spravny cas, abych napsala dalsi zpravu. Stalo se neco necekaneho, neco co me rozplakalo, neco vyznamneho a  muzou za to Sofia a Mia.

Two songs shuffled through the playlist that we had started listening to this past January. 'So glad I'm here' and 'You are my sunshine' by Elizabeth Mitchell. Sofia mentioned that we listened to those when Mimi and Oompah (my parents) were here this winter because of Martin. And then Mia started telling funny, good memories from when Martin was in the hospital. We were rolling, laughing so hard. I asked them what else they remember, and I couldn't believe it. They spoke of good memories.

Sofia poznala dve pisnicky, ktere hraly v pozadi a vzpominala, jak jsme je poslouchali v zime, kdyz tu byli moji rodice a Martin byl v nemocnici. (Elizabeth Mitchell: “So glad I’m here” a “You are my sunshine”). Do toho ji skocila Mia a zacala vypravet co vsechno legracniho se prihodilo kdyz byl Martin v nemocnici. Vsichni jsme se smali, Miu neslo zastavit, a ja jsem tomu nemohla uverit.. Oni si pamatovali ty hezke chvile!!

It has been a terrible season for us. Brutal in many ways. But by God's grace, if we look real hard (or just ask the girls) we can see little glimpses of goodness. And if we take a BIG step back, like a 3 month step back, we can see big good.

Porad jeste prochazime obdobim, ktere je hrozne. Dokonce  v nekterych ohledech, brutalni. Diky Bozi milosti, (a  nebo kdyz se zeptame holek) je mozne videt stripky toho dobreho. A kdyz se nam podari dat si jeste vetsi odstup, pak I v tech poslednich 3 mesicich muzeme videt vetsi dobro, co se udalo.

I think I've needed to wait this long to write this blog post to be able to start it in this way. I have mentioned to people that I have wanted to talk about this time in past tense...and it just never seemed to come. We are still very much in it. But tonight, after dinner conversation with the girls and Martin I do feel that now is different than January and February. Thank God.

Hrozne bych si prala, abych mohla psat o vecech v minulem case. Proto jsem I odkladala psani blogu, protoze to porad byla pritomnost a ja chtela aby uz odesla. Sice se nase situace moc nezmenila, ale dneska jsem uz , diky Bohu. schopna videt rozdil oproti lednu a unoru!

The most recent update is that Martin is (we are) still in recovery. The treatment that started in November with arsenic, then chemo in his spine, radiation and finished over Christmas with very aggressive chemotherapy was a lot. As intense as his treatment was, this recovery time is even more so. It's long and slow and frustrating. There really is no news other than Martin is resting and taking it slow, and the girls and I are keeping normal life moving along.

Martin se zotavuje z celeho narocneho cyklu lecby, ktery zacal v listopadu. Nejdriv arzenik, chemoterapie do mozkomisniho moku, ozarovani a pak jeste vysoce agresivni chemoterapii pres vanoce v nemocnici. Jeho telo dostalo zabrat a tak zotaveni jde velice pomalu. Tak pomalu, ze je to k nastvani. Martin hodne lezi, odpociva a kazdy den se snazi udelat o krok navic, mezitim co ja a holky mame normalni tydenni program.

Martin came home from the month stay in the hospital on 22 January. This was amazing news and of course we were thrilled. To have our little family complete again was an incredible feeling. I really mean it when I say it was one of the first nights of good sleep for the girls and I. I don't want to forget the goodness of his return and the news of his remission. This is amazing news and although I know that, my struggle is figuring out what that means.

Martin byl propusten z nemocnice 22.ledna. Byly jsme nadsene, nase rodina byla znovu spolu a bylo to uzasne. Byla to prvni noc po dlouhe dobe, kdy jsme se s holkama opravdu vyspaly. Remise leukemie a jeho navrat domu byly pro nas tim dobrym. I presto, ze to bylo dobre, zapasila jsem s tim, jak to bude dal.

The next several weeks after his return home were extremely difficult and a very dark time. He was here but wasn't here, and although we knew he was recovering from treatment, it was (is) so slow that to us, he actually seemed more sick than ever. He was weak, tired and dealing with some side-effects that were no fun! We experienced the deepest part of the definition of fatigue. In my book from the American Cancer Society, it describes fatigue as: 'when a person has less or no energy to do the things he or she normally does or wants to do. This is different from the tiredness that comes with everyday life. Fatigue related to cancer treatment can appear suddenly and can be overwhelming. It is not relieved by rest and patients can feel more tired after rest. It can last for months.'

Nasledujici tydny byly extremne narocne a temne. I presto, ze byl Martin doma, tak vlastne nebyl. I presto, ze se zotavoval, vypadalo to ze je vic nemocnej nez pred tim. Byl unavany a slaby, a vedlejsich ucinku pribyvalo. V jedne knizce o rakovine popsali tento druh vycerpani tak, ze je to kdyz “clovek ma minimalni, nebo nema zadnou energii pro veci,ktere dela zcela bezne. Toto je odlisne od unavy z kazdodenniho zivota. Vycerpani spojene s lecbou rakoviny prichazi necekane a neni jednoduche se s tim vyporadat.

Pacienti se po odpocinku muzou citit jeste vice unaveni, ne vzdy je odpocinek ulevou. Toto muze trvat cele mesice.”

Thanks to fatigue, I learned about energy. A shower, a card came, watching a movie, reading or talking on the phone, walking across the flat...any of these would knock Martin out for several hours, even after sleeping 15 hours. I learned that it takes energy to even focus on someone and connect. It takes energy to be an audience member of a two-girl concert and react. It takes energy (and strength) to balance the laptop when watching a short show. It takes energy to bring forward personality. All of you who know Martin know just how much energy he has and it is hard to imagine him without it. Especially for weeks.

Diky “vycerpani” jsem se naucila hodne o energii. Sprcha, karty, film, cteni, hovor na telefonu, prejit z loznice do kuchyne – kazdy krok bral Martinovi energii na nekolik dalsich hodin, I kdyz predtim spal  treba 15 hodin. Poznala jsem, kolik je potreba energie soustredit se na rozhovor, kolik ho to stalo energie aby si vyslechl koncert co pro nej holky pripravily, nebo kolik energie ho stalo udrzet laptop a podivat se na talk show nebo film. A co teprve byt porad tou samou osobou? Ti, kdo znate Martina, vite kolik mel energie, a ta ted byla na nekolik tydnu pryc.

The struggle of these past few months have been holding it all. I have had the chance and support of talking regularly with a really great listener/counselor. She calls it the 'both/and'. The more I think about it and reflect on it, it is the 'both/and' that has pulled, pushed and shaped me. Learning to hold both the really hard reality, fears, disappointments and even anger together at the same time AND the beauty and hope in Jesus. To hold them, sometimes in balance, often clumsily. To feel the weight of BOTH. To not confuse the good news of the Gospel with good test results, although related. To gaze on each one, react to both the hard and the good. To let them lead me deeper into the other, ultimately into deeper grace and love for the Lord and for Martin.

Behem poslednich mesicu jsem se snazilo to cele nejak vydrzet. Jsem rada, ze moje mentorka umi vyborne naslouchat, protoze diky tomu presne odhadla, jakou radou me muze povzbudit. Jeji rada do me situace, presne popisuje kde se nachazim, jak premyslim, a jak me to ovlivnuje. Na jedne strane je tu zavaznost nemoci, strach, zklamani a hnev, na druhe strane je tu nadherna nadeje v Jezisi. Nekdy se zda, ze obe strany maji stejnou vahu. Je to zapas. Kazda me vede vic k porozumneni te druhe, ale obe me privadi k hlubsimu vztahu s Panem Jezisem a Martinem.

It is not easy to hold both at the same time. It's definitely easy to camp in self pity or sadness. Or to step completely out of it and into 'Everything will be fine. God is good. It is good'. Life is going back and forth...we can't stay in either place too long. But to hold them both...that is where the miracle is. Henri Nouwen says that to drink the cup of sorrow and the cup of joy is the to drink the cup of LIFE. I love that image and that Jesus leads us in it. This is what I want to learn to do for the rest of my life and teach my girls. Or maybe learn it from them!

Jsou chvile, kdy je jednodussi se litovat, byt smutna. Pak jsou chvile, kdy si rikam,

“Dopadne to dobre. Buh je dobry. Bude to dobre.” V zivote nemuzeme zustat prilis dlouho na jednom miste. Balancovat zivot v realite nemoci a zaroven mit nadeji v Kristu, to uz je zazrak. Henri Nouwen rika ze pit z kalichu bolesti a pit z kalichu radosti je pit z kalichu ZIVOTA.  Chci se to ucit po zbytek zivota a taky to chci ucit moje holky nebo to mozna budou ucit ony me!

We are juggling the 'both/and' and are healing. The girls actually have passed pneumonia between each other and I am trying to gracefully be the healthy parent. In some ways it seems like our life which was going a million miles an hour in many directions has shrunk and is boiled down to 'just' getting us healthy. Instead of 'shrunk', I should say 'focused'. I still remember the harsh snap into focus that happens when the doctor calls with bad news. The phone call at the end of October. Just Jesus and family with cancer (both/and!). That's it. Painfully clear focus. I have felt tired from all of the 'focusing' and feel the urge to zoom out, but I can't yet. I'll write about patience in another post :)

Pretahovani obou stran pokracuje a my se uzdravujeme. Holky si mezisebou predaly zapal plic a ja se snazim, abych byla zdrava. V posledni dobe mam pocit, ze je to muj jediny ukol – postarat se aby vsichni byli zdravi. Je to moje priorita. Uz od konce rijna, kdy nam zavolal Martinuv doktor, aby nam rekl o relapsu. Pamatuji si, jak to zmenilo muj pohled na zivot. Je tu Jezis a my, rodina s rakovinou.

Martin is (slowly) getting stronger. He was looking pretty poorly and had lost a lot of weight, but is starting to get a little stronger. We like to compare Fridays. I must say that today he is better than last Friday. It is not a steady increase, and I guard my heart from excitement and expectation, but he is better and we are thankful.

Martin pomalu nabira sily. Nevypadal dobre, hodne zhubl, a nemel vubec silu na normalni veci. Kazdy patek srovnavame, jak se citi oproti predchozimu tydni. Pomalu se to lepsi. Dneska je silnejsi nez byl pred tydnem. Pokrok ale neni videt kazdy den, a tak I ja se musim drzet pri zemi a neocekavat nerealne. Jsem moc vdecna za to ze mu dneska je lip!!!!

We continue to be forever grateful for YOU! Thoughts, prayers, calls, all of the million ways you have loved and supported us.... I can't begin to say thank you.

Jsme Vam velice vdecni za neustalou podporu! Diky za to, ze na nas myslite, modlite se za nas a pomahate nam I mnoha praktickymi zpusoby.

Now that I have broken the silence, more posts are on the way :)

Ted, kdyz uz jsem konecne prolomila to dlouhe ticho, tak brzo pridam dalsi zpravy

grace and peace,

jane

thank you, Martin Hasik for translation. 

Only by God's grace

  (by Martin) Only by God’s grace..

(od Martina) To je Boží milost.

I was released from the hospital this morning.

Dnes ráno jsem byl propuštěn z nemocnice.

When I was admitted, I didn’t expect a miracle of being told to go home. Instead, they told me to count on 4 – 6 weeks of a hospital stay. Its been 4 weeks and two days. Only by God’s grace..

Když jsem byl přijat, neočekával jsem zázrak toho, že mě pustí domů. Naopak mi řekli, abych počítal s čtyřmi, šesti týdny v nemocnici. Bylo to čtyři týdny a dva dny. To je Boží milost.

During the hospital stay, I only had one roommate - a gentleman, a little bit older than me, who didn’t watch TV all day and didn’t snore. This whole time we stayed in the formal way of addressing each other, but that didn’t slow us down to talk and laugh with each other, with the doctors and the staff. Only by God’s grace..

Během mého pobytu v nemocnici, jsem měl jen jednoho „spolubydlícího“. Muže trošku staršího než já sám, co se nedíval na televizi a nechrápal. Po celý tento čas jsme si vykali, ale neodradilo nás to od společných rozhovorů a smíchu spolu s doktory a zdravotníky. To je Boží milost.

I was told before hand what will be the treatment be like and what side effects to expect. I have had all the side effects that are not permanently damaging and the only thing that will take a while before it settles to normal are the headaches. Only once I came close to being transferred to ICU because of a very high fever, but the pills kicked in and I stayed in my bed. Only by God’s grace..

Předtím mi bylo sděleno, jaká bude léčba a jaké očekávat vedlejší účinky. Měl jsem všechny vedlejší účinky, které nemají trvalé následky a jediná věc, která ještě chvíli potrvá, než se zklidní, jsou bolesti hlavy. Jen jednou jsem byl téměř převezen na jednotku intenzívní péče kvůli vysokým horečkám. Nakonec ale zabraly léky a mohl jsem zůstat ve své posteli. To je Boží milost.

Jane’s parents flew in three days before I went in, and they left yesterday. There is no way we could plan this on our own. They were a huge help and it was really a blessing to have them here, while I was away from my family. So thankful that they are willing and able to come and help. They were kind enough to stop by to see me whenever they would be freed from the child care. Only by God’s grace..

Janini rodiče přiletěli tři dny před tím, než jsem byl přijat a letěli zpět včera. Toto jsme nemohli naplánovat sami. Byli pro nás velkou pomocí a požehnáním když tu byli s námi, když jsem byl daleko od své rodiny. Jsem tak vděčný, že mohli přijet a pomoci. Byli hodní se zastavit kdykoli nehlídali děti. To je Boží milost.

Jane and the girls were able to come quite often and even though it was not enough, it was enough. I have had some old and new friends to come visit me so the days when I could receive visitors, flew by very quickly.  many of them were kind enough to bring me what I was craving at the very moment.  Only by God’s grace..

Jane a holky tu byly celkem často a i když to nebylo dost, bylo to hodně. Několik starých i nových kamarádů mě přislo navštívit ve dny, kdy jsem směl přijímat návštěvy, takže ty opravdu ubíhaly rychle! Mnoho z nich bylo ochotných mi přinést cokoli, na co jsem měl zrovna chuť. To je Boží milost.

At two occasions, Christmas and Mia’s 4^thbirthday last week, both Jane’s parents and my family got together to celebrate, leaving Jane as the “only” bilingual person in the room.  Gathering stories from sofia and mia, comparing them with what my family shared and what Jane’s parents shared, it was a great time of ONE family being together. Only by God’s grace..

U dvou příležitostí, Vánoce a čtvrté narozeniny Mii, se sešli rodiče Jane i moji aby oslavovali, což zanechalo Jane jedinou bilingvní osobou v místnosti. Shromažoďování zážitků od Sofii a Mii, porovnávání s tím co sdílela rodina Jane a rodina má, byl skvělý čas JEDNÉ velké rodiny pospolu. To je Boží milost.

I wish I could say that the war is over. I can’t. There is still a lot of uncertainty, but for right now, I go home to spend time with my ladies and rest. Only by God’s grace..

Přál bych si říci, že válka je u konce. Ale nemohu. Je tu stále mnoho nejistoty, ale nyní mohu jít domů a trávit čas s holkama a odpočívat. To je Boží milost.

Arriving home, I was welcomed by over 200 smiling faces in my living room. Thankfully, they weren’t actually here because we wouldn’t fit, but it was a wonderful welcome home. I felt the love all the way from Japan through Hradec Kralove all the way to Alaska! I feel very blessed and privileged to have such a big team/family of supporters that the only way I can explain this gift is – only by God’s grace.

Při příchodu domů jsem byl uvítán před 200 usměvavými tvářemi z mého obýváku. Naštěstí tam nebyli doopravdy, protože bychom se nevešli, ale bylo to pro mě krásné přivítání. Cítil jsem lásku z Japonska, přes Hradec Králové až na Aljašku! Cítím se velmi požehnán a je to privilegium mít tak velký tým/rodinu podpory, že jediná cesta, jak tento dar vysvětlit je – To je Boží milost.

thank you Veronika!!!